The Bucket List (Or Signs of a Mid-Life Crisis…I’m Not Sure)
Over the past few weeks, I have realised a lot, most of it really useless, like I only just learned that you can not lick your elbow. Like…at all. YOU CAN NOT LICK YOUR ELBOW. If somehow some of your ice-cream spilled on your elbow, there would be no way of getting it back, you would have to wipe it off because there is NO WAY OF LICKING IT OFF YOUR ELBOW. (Don’t judge me, you would lick your elbow too if you could).
But more importantly, I realised that life is short, it’s fleeting, it’s not promised or guaranteed or maybe it’s even a little pointless but we’ll save that cynicism for another day. So short and unpromised and unguaranteed as life is, should I be lucky enough to be around for the next 365 days, here is a list of things I promise to at least try to do. You are welcome to join me
- Take a Trip
I don’t know how many trips my #bff and I have planned. We have an outstanding trip to Durban, an outstanding Joburg trip and a Harare trip, a Vic Falls trip (at least this one even made it to the whatsapp group stage), Matopos trip and Botswana trip. I’m pretty sure we even have an outstanding trip to the movies (but babes why sinje?). I also have outstanding trips with Shmack, Belz, Yolly, Nonc, Nyarie, Cath, Tsa…okay I get how it may seem like I’m the problem here but that’s what we’re trying to fix now. So before the 12th of June 2020, I will take a trip and I will take pictures and I will show you because I believe in accountability.
- Be in front of the camera
For a person who loves attention as much I do, I thoroughly hate attention. I believe I am camera shy. No Agnes, your Iphone 4 does not count. I am so awkward around cameras and I didn’t realise just how much until a friend of mine tried to take one of those unexpected pictures of me, he’s one of those artistic types (I am pretty sure he has pictures of his cat’s poop somewhere). Anyway, he tried, it didn’t work, I hate being on camera. Late last year someone asked me to be a walk in character in their short film. The job was simple: Nkosi, just walk past. And Nkosi couldn’t walk past. Nkosi looked for every possible reason not to and Nkosi didn’t. We’re doing things differently now, if you need Nkosi to be walk in character, Nkosi will be just that, she’ll even be a video vixen if you ask nicely. (lol no she won’t but it’s nice to pretend)
- Fall in Love
Following is a list of people who will roll their eyes and possibly stop reading once they see this: Fikile Nyathi, Tyron Ncube, Shirley Chapunza, Belinda Nobanda, Nozibelo Maphosa and Evon Ncube (my mother’s eyes will roll for different reasons). Everyone else will highlight how I always say this but then never do anything to actively achieve it. They’ll tell you I spend my entire life in my room and I suck at responding to messages and Tyron might say something about defences (he’s smart but he’s also a show off). Anyway, worry no more children, we’re seeing it through this time.
- Make New Friends
I am introverted introvert. Which basically means I have zero social skills. I mean I’m polite and all that but human interaction doesn’t come naturally to me,it’s not an organic instinct that I have, it’s something I have to deliberately conjure up. 75% of my life happens in my head and I realise how that may seem unusual. So yes, I will actively try to make friends and guess what…I’ll post the selfies to prove it.
- Ride a Train
24 years alive and I have never been on a train. Mobile or not. And I can’t justify this. I have never been on a train and I haven’t. I can feel the judgement coming from you on your
moral high horsestransport high trains…so I’ll leave it here for today
So I give you full permission to hold me accountable as far as this is concerned. Feel free to suggest anything else you think I should try out.